Monday, December 31, 2012

Adieu, 2012.

In few minutes from now, we will be bidding 2012 a good bye, and say hello to the 2013. Everyone is wishing for all the negativities to be left behind, and hope for the best to be received come 2013. 2012 has been one crazy roller coaster ride for me, just like all the past years. But what made this year different was, despite all the bad stuff, there were more good things that surfaced.

I may have lost few friends along my life's journey, but I definitely gained new ones, and old friendships have grown stronger. No life status nor educational background, all the more age, can dictate a friendship. Friends I have made this year have come from all walks of life, and it does not matter to me. There are the friends who are there to listen, ready to give you a hug, ears to listen to whatever you say, a shoulder to cry on, gives me an imaginary slap to return to reality, and urges me to take risk and not to give up. You know who you are, thank you for being there. Near, far, it doesn't matter, you surely are a real friend.

I did not expect to fall for someone this year. After falling in love and being disappointed, I just couldn't bring myself to fall all over again. But slowly, and unexpectedly, I did, funnily, to someone who was initially a complete stranger to me. Love isn't my priority really, but it comes, and I grab it.

Academics, they burned me out. I got to the point where I wanted to just let go-- again. My heart wasn't there anymore although I am happy on where I am right now. And with school, I found my love for volunteering at the hospital, prompting me to gain more knowledge when it comes to the small animal medicine world. I may not be as good with theoretical as I used to be years ago, but I sure learn a lot from hands on experiences on the months I've been volunteering.

Life itself is crazy. So much fights, frustrations, anger, hatred, disappointments, laughter, memories, experiences, risk; name it, it's there. As Forrest Gump said, "Life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get." And with my friends around, they keep me sane, snapping me back to reality. Just another positive side of my life, I started healthy living again. :)

On new year's eve, we await for the entrance of the new 365 days that we will face with hope, courage, fear, or whatever else. I was rewatching New Year's Eve a while back on TV, and Hilary Swank said, "And as you all can see, the ball has stopped half way to its perch. it's suspended there to remind us before we pop the champagne and celebrate the new year, to stop, and reflect on the year that has gone by, to remember both our triumphs and our missteps, our promises made and broken, the times we opened ourselves up to great adventures... or closed ourselves down for fear of getting hurt, because that's what new year's all about , getting another chance, a chance to forgive. to do better, to do more, to give more, to love more, and to stop worrying about what if... and start embracing what will be. so when that ball drops at midnight, and it will drop, let's remember to be nice to each other, kind to each other, and not just tonight but all year long."

I am wishing for a wonderful 2013. No more big new year's resolutions for me-- just like for the past couple of years, just the simple, practical ones:

  1. Continue living healthy
  2. Concentrate with studies
  3. Go with the flow
  4. Take risk

Happy new year, everyone! Have an awesome 2013! 


“Respect yourself and others will respect you.”
― Confucius, Sayings of Confucius

Respect. Paggalang. 尊敬.

How hard is it to respect another person? Like the quote above, you have to learn to respect yourself first before you could respect others, because if you don't respect yourself, how can you expect them to respect you back? Respecting yourself is when you know until where is your self-limitation, how you dress, how you bring yourself to public. 

When we were younger, our parents and teachers taught us to respect the elders. Yet as we grow older, wiser, and more mature, we learned that we don't only respect those who are older that than us, but we should also respect those who are younger.

When we respect other people, we don't choose whom to respect; everybody deserves to be respected, whether he is a very rich person or someone who has nothing. Even if he's the jeepney driver, or a bystander, or a security guard, or even the drunkard. May he be a PhD degree holder or someone who is not given the chance to study for a degree.

Respect is also given to someone who admits his weaknesses; it may seem that he is ashamed of what he lacks, but this could not mean that you will take pity on that person. Instead, it actually could lead you to have a bigger respect on that person for having the courage to admit of his weaknesses.

In my opinion, respect, like trust, is earned. And once broken, it may be difficult for you to gain the other person's respect on you. We must not abuse the respect being given to us by others.

Saturday, November 03, 2012

Talking to myself

4 years ago, I was here contemplating on what to do with my life after a semester of medical school. I am now here again, 2 years and a semester in veterinary medicine. 1 year and a semester more and I will be done. But why am I now having doubts? I honestly don't want to give up especially now I'm nearing the end. But why am on the verge of surrendering?

4 years ago, I sat on the steps of the terrace saying that I have finally moved on and I am free. Now, I sat there again, thinking if this is it or this is just another dream and not a possibility at all; actually wondering what is really this between us.

Between 4 years ago and now, what was the difference? None. Both instances are giving me doubts on myself, insecurities building up, wondering a lot about the future. What does the future hold for me? Could those things that I want be in my future or they'd continue to be dreams only?

Dreams. I have a lot of it for my future. Love. Family. Career. Kids. Grand kids. License. Friends. But could those dreams of mine come true? I dream that he is the one, but is he really the one? I dream of having my own family, but will I have my own family? I have dreamed of a lot of careers that I want to be, but is any of it will be my career; better yet, will I be a successful veterinarian in the future? I dream of having kids of my own, but am I capable of bearing offspring? And the question continues to will there be my own grand kids?

Should I decide not to give up, I will be graduating in a year, and board exams come right after; will I graduate on time? Will I pass the board exams in one take? Will I be able to have enough knowledge for the exam? Friends come and go, who will be there for me until the end? Who will just leave me behind in a snap?

Here I go again, me and my babbling mind. My babbling mind that cannot be tamed, full of questions but no answers at all, full of doubts and worries but no assurances and comfort, full of love to give but gets nothing in return, full of dreams but gets nothing in reality.

-bridgetco Pontevedra, November 2, 2012, 21:23

Sunday, October 28, 2012

Berso sa Metro: Pedro Calderon de la Barca

¿Qué es la vida? Un frenesí.
¿Qué es la vida? Una ilusión,
una sombra, una ficción,
y el mayor bien es pequeño;
que toda la vida es sueño,
y los sueños, sueños son.

Ano nga ba ang buhay? isang kahibangan;
Ano nga ba ang buhay? isang ilusyon,
isang anino, isang kasinungalingan.
At ang malalaking biyaya'y maliliit pa rin,
dahil ang buhay ay isa lamang pangarap
at ang mga pangarap ay pangarap lamang.

La vida es sueño
Pedro Calderón de la Barca (Madrid, 1600-1681)

Saturday, October 20, 2012

Middle Child Syndrome

Last Saturday, my friends and I were talking about being a middle child, and experiencing the "Middle Child Syndrome". One of my friends said that I should overcome this just as she had. 

Just what is this Middle Child Syndrome?

I am posting an article I found from the site, regarding the Middle Child Syndrome.

Whether you have a middle child, are a middle child, or know a middle child, everyone seems to understand that when it comes to placement in a family that’s the worst place to be. People have so many reasons for believing this; some think that the middle child simply gets forgotten for no reason, others believe that the eldest is the leader and the youngest is the baby, but the middle child has no real place. Other still believe that parents love the eldest child because he was the first, and the youngest because he is the last, but that the middle child has no real special place.

How much of this is true? Possibly none of it and possibly all of it; it could just be an idea that has continued to spread over time, and whenever a middle child happens to feel left out, they determine that it must be because of their birth placement. It could also be very real which would mean that something needs to be done to solve the problem. The question of whether this middle child syndrome is real or not is very debatable, but here are some of the facts that have been found so far.

What Are the Characteristics?
It’s important to keep in mind that just like with any other syndrome, these characteristics are general; just because your child shows different symptoms or doesn’t show any of these does not mean that they are not suffering in some way. Some of the most common characteristics include low self-esteem, jealousy, feelings of emptiness or inadequacy, unfriendliness, and a tendency to be introverted.

Middle children tend to feel that they are unseen, so they may suffer from low self-esteem. Even if they are capable of doing something, they may constantly ask for your help in order to get your attention. That old saying, "The squeaky wheel gets the grease," tends to be something that middle children live by. They tend to beat themselves up over the tiniest of failures and do not set goals for themselves.

For some reason, if you look at most families one parent tends to bond with the oldest child while the other tends to form a bond with the youngest. The middle child takes notice of this and feels unloved. This leads to their feelings of inadequacy and that empty feeling that many of us often experience. Jealousy also comes into play here because they resent everything that the other children do. In extreme cases, middle children even act out with what some would call "psychotic" behavior. All of that jealousy and resentment just piles up inside of them until they just lash out in anger or violence.

Middle children are often described as a little, "off," as they just don’t seem to know how to fit in. The self-esteem issues that they have lead them to be very introverted and somewhat unfriendly. They are not necessarily incapable of making friends, they are just too shy and insecure to try and do so.

As you can see, it’s very difficult to catch middle child syndrome right away because there are two completely opposite and extreme personalities that your child could take on. The angry and aggressive child is definitely more extroverted and voices his anger very clearly. On the other hand, there is the introverted child who is quiet, lonely, and a little weird.

What Are Some Possible Causes?

So far, the causes of the middle child personality have been narrowed down to two main ones; an identity crisis and a lack of support.

Identity crisis is self-explanatory and after reading the characteristics, it’s easy to see that this is clearly a big issue. The middle child has no idea where he fits in, what is expected, or how to gain approval. They feel unimportant, unseen, and unheard; this leaves them wondering where they belong in the grand scheme of things. As previously stated, the oldest and youngest children tend to be the "favorites," meaning that they form a closer bond with one parent or the other. While parents may not realize it, the middle child is very aware of this favoritism and is left feeling like they never get any attention.

Parents do not mean to be unsupportive towards the middle child, but it appears that it happens anyways. The middle child silently suffers and parents are unaware of it, which only leads to more and more issues. If anything, the middle child needs a little extra attention to ensure that they know that they are loved, appreciated, and heard.

Are There Any Solutions?

In all reality, the solution for middle child syndrome will vary greatly from family to family. In some cases, taking the time to talk with your child and allowing them to express their feelings may be enough. You can find out what it is that they need and then be sure to give it to them. In other cases, there may already be serious damage done, and the child and family may require counseling or other professional help.

One thing to be sure of though, is to not baby the middle child. Putting more emphasis on this syndrome than necessary will only take the issue to a whole new level and cause your child to be even more dependent on you and your approval. The key is to treat all of your children exactly the same; there is no reason to dedicate more time and attention to one child than another (unless there are special needs involved, and then the entire situation changes dramatically), and there is no reason to exclude a child. Take your children’s feelings into careful consideration before speaking or acting; weigh the possibilities of one feeling left out, and do what you can to ensure that things are always as fair and equal as possible.

Whether middle child syndrome makes an appearance in your home will depend a great deal on your parenting and family atmosphere. While you cannot dictate the personality that your child will have, you can do your best to make sure that the middle child does not become invisible.


Being a middle child is not at all fun for me. I am always being compared to my elder sister when we were younger until teen years. They use my sister to "mold" me; she's always at the top of their class, very studious, doesn't easily get distracted when studying, and the like. They wanted me to be like that. They got disappointed when I was out of the Top 3 by the end of the school year thus I got no medal during the Graduation ceremonies. And every quarter, same thing happens-- they expect me to be on the top-- until they got tired of expecting, I think. Even the schools where my sister went to, they wanted me to study there. But I don't. I wanted so badly to get out of her shadow. Eventually, I did.

Like what was said in the article, the characteristics of something suffering or experiencing this middle child syndrome tends to be an introvert, prone to having low self-esteem, prone to jealousy, and feeling of emptiness. Yes, I am all of those. As the low self-esteem stays, I have a hard time building up a conversation. I am not much of a talker (unless I am super comfortable with the person; well, most of the time, that is), I am more of the listener. My feelings are tucked inside, and my outlet is writing.

Being a middle child means not having the privilege your other siblings have. They would just say that they would come home late, your parents would suddenly volunteer on fetching them. While you, when you're out late and ask them to fetch you, they would blabber all excuses, implicitly telling you to make your own way on going home. Your siblings will just make parinig that they like this gadget and stuff, the next thing you know, your parents brought them that gadget. While you, you tell your parents what you like, and they will answer you that that's expensive or something like that. 

You know you thrive for their attention when you do something good or achieved something, but they never look your way on those occasions. But when you unintentionally do something that would displease them, they would suddenly look your way and flood you with sermons, and whatever else. I know how disappointed they are when I said I will not continue studying Medicine, and I know how not very much supportive they are with my decision of taking up Veterinary Medicine. If I pass the board examination in few years, will they be proud of me or still tutting behind me?

Sunday, September 30, 2012

Gising Na

Rocksteddy songs always capture my heart. If you've been reading my blog from the start, you'll be able to view some of their songs that I've posted.


Bukas sa pag gising mo'y 
Babangon ang umaga 
Dala ang pag-asa na matagal nang nawala
At bukas sa pag gising mo'y wala na ang problema
Nilimot na ng panahon at inanod na ng alon 

Handa nang tawirin
Handa nang harapin ang mundo

Kaya't gising na kaibigan
Buksan ang 'yong isipan
At subukang pakinggan
Ang tinig nang karamihan
Ang boses ng kabataan
Gising na kaibigan ko, gising na, ha!

Bukas sa pag gising mo'y 
Sisikat din ang araw 
Dala ang pag-ibig na matagal nang hinintay 
Kung sakali mang dumating 
Na lumipas ang panahon 
Iyo pa ring mararamdaman 
Andun pa rin ang apoy

Repeat refrain
Repeat chorus

Hindi na mangangamba 
Hindi na malulumbay 
Hindi na matatakot 
Ang puso na muling magmahal at umibig ng lubos 
Lumipad patungo sa iyong tabi

Repeat chorus 2x

Kaya't gising na kaibigan
Buksan ang 'yong isipan
At subukang pakinggan
Ang tinig nang karamihan
Ang boses ng puso mo
Gising na kaibigan ko, gising na...

 Credits: video from Youtube, lyrics from

Monday, September 03, 2012

You Should Date Someone Who Cares About You

This is copied from this site. Enjoy reading!

You Should Date Someone Who Cares About You 
MAY. 3, 2012 By NICO LANG

 You should be with someone who values your time and calls when they say they are going to, who shows up on time to a date or texts you if they are going to be late. Spend your time with people who aren’t too important to look up from their phone and stop texting when you are speaking or who know not to answer unimportant calls when you are together. Someone who politely apologizes for taking that important call and knows who to pick up for. Someone who also knows that their parents and their grandparents are important in their life, too, and has a good enough relationship with their family to pick up when they call. Someone who still tells their mother or father “I love you,” even when they are in public, and who can’t wait to tell you, when the time is ready.

Date a person who is chivalrous, not as in “into patriarchy, paternalism and/or oppressing you” but as in someone who isn’t afraid to show they care about you. No matter your gender, be with someone who wants to open the door for you, just to smile as they watch you walk through it, and someone who lets you do the same for them. Someone who will pull out a chair for you or stand up when you leave the table, not because it’s expected of them socially but they want to show you how much your company means to them. Someone who wants to walk you home, not only to make sure you are safe but also because they want to spend more time with you and smile at you as your smile disappears behind the door. Someone who will wait up to hear you got home safe if they can’t walk you home and will ask you to walk them home, because they want to feel protected by you, too.

Seek out a mate who isn’t afraid to hold your hand or put their coat around you when you look cold, who knows that Public Displays of Affection aren’t as important as knowing you are cared for, even in small ways. Put your energy into a person who puts their energy and effort into you, someone who will buy you flowers if you like flowers or knows exactly what book you would want on your birthday. Someone who has listened to your opinions, your hopes and your desires enough to know the things you like and the things you don’t like, the correct ways to show you they care. Someone who knows to ask when you want to be held and caressed and when you want your space, when you want to have sex and what consent is. Someone who knows how important the word “no” is.

Date a person who tells you nice things about yourself and builds up your confidence but challenges you when you need to be challenged. You deserve to be with those who know when to argue and to call you on your bullsh-t, but also know when signals from you tell them to leave you alone and let it be. Someone who won’t let you go to bed angry and is willing to talk about what’s bothering you, if even what’s bothering you doesn’t quite make sense or seem that important to them. Someone who knows that personal relationships aren’t as simple as who is right and who is wrong, that your opinion and perspective are valid, even when the two of you totally disagree. Someone who knows you aren’t always right and they aren’t always right but are willing to affirm the person your belief system, because your opinions are a part of the person they adore.

Spend time with people who don’t make you choose between being friends and being lovers, who you feel like you can genuinely have fun and be comfortable with. You need to be able to be casual, hang out in your pajama pants and be like buddies sometimes, while also valuing the romantic side of your connection. Someone who (when you get that far) understands what balance is in a relationship, that sometimes you need to go out and do your own thing. Someone who trusts you to make your own choices and to come home and be with them at the end of the night without the need to interrogate you, or if you are in an open relationship, someone who always trusts that your connection is stronger. Someone who gets that being together and waking up together every day is a choice, one you have to continue to make and continue to commit to.

Date someone who wants what you want, who is open to the idea of the relationship you desire with another human being. You need to be with people who are open to what you have to give to them and are willing to match it. Someone who has communicated enough on the subject to know what you are looking for with someone, whether that be a fling, friends with benefits or a person to bring home to your parents or chosen family. Someone who isn’t afraid to give you what you want in life but also respects themselves enough to have standards and value what they need and deserve in this relationship (or even friendship!) Someone who isn’t afraid to let you know how they feel: about you, about life, about what’s important to them, about the future or about whatever is on their mind.

Life is short, so you shouldn’t waste it on someone who doesn’t understand you, refuses to try and get you, won’t put in the time for you, who is rude to you, your friends or to other people and doesn’t even call you. Don’t worry about if they read, if they don’t read, if they watch movies or if they’re into the wrong kind of music; worry about whether they care that you do. Details are important, but if the world ends this year, it’ll be more important to say you wasted the time you have left with someone who cares.

Friday, August 31, 2012

Life of a Clinician

I admit that at first when we were told that we were to have a 60-hour duty requirement at the vet hospital as part of our Clinical Orientation subject, how I dreaded my duty hours to arrive! Why? 1 thing: I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING. Seriously. I was like "Uh oh. How will I survive 60 hours of duty with a very very very little knowledge of what to do?! Bahala na."

And so my 60-hour duty started few weeks back. It was a pressuring "job" as you have to be alert with everything around you. Attend to the clients when they come in, watch what was being done on the patient in the treatment room, get the vital signs, restrain the animal, and so on. But later on, I realized that it's not as pressuring as it was before us clinicians get to do our required duty as they are only few people working in the hospital. With the clinicians there, their jobs have eased a bit as the veterinarians will go attend the patients immediately and not mind entertaining newly entered clients.

The life of a clinician isn't easy. As it is a stepping stone into becoming a veterinarian in the future, one must be knowledgeable of the symptoms of the disease so you can have at least an idea what the patient is going through. It is also a practice on how to deal with the clients as the patients themselves are not able to talk. These clients come in different walks of life, literally and figuratively speaking. As we converse with them, we could "conclude" what kind of person they are. There are the kind ones, really kind enough to understand that what you're doing is a difficult one/ doing a lot so you are spared from being rushed on whatever you're doing. Some other patients are the bitchy ones. Nangmamaliit ng mga clinicians and staff, but when faced with the veterinarian, it's as if he never said anything bad. Also, there are the impatient clients. Every after few minutes, the client asks if the vet will still be held longer from his previous engagement. And, it won't be avoided to have emotional clients, whom you can see that they really care and love their pets. These clients bring their pets to the hospital not only if the need arises, but also in a regular schedule for checkups.

It is fulfilling to work as a clinician in the hospital. It may not be as haggard as it will be when in the farm duties (I think), but at the end of the day, it seems like all your energy has been drained yet you can still smile after all the bruhaha of the day.

I will be finishing my 60-hour duty tomorrow already. Honestly, it saddens me that it has come to the end when I've already started learning to enjoy it. I know I still have a lot to learn, but I'm learning new things at least every duty that I've been to.

The good news is, I can still walk into the hospital and continue my job. But now, as a volunteer. :) I am so looking forward in doing this again. But in all honesty, I still don't know if I would want to have a small animal clinic when I have my license in few years. But the final decision making can wait after achieving that license. :)

Monday, July 23, 2012

Mabuhay ang Bagong Kasal!

My second cousin Marc and my friend Pau got married last Saturday, July 21, 2012. It was raining like there's no tomorrow, just like Ondoy few years back. So anyway, despite the bad weather, the wedding pushed through and they said their "I Dos" and had their first kiss.

 A week before the wedding, they announced that I like be giving a speech for the bride! Man, I freaked out-- really freaked out. But because I love my cousin and my friend so much, how could I turn them down? I decided to start doing the speech Monday last week, even though I have no slightest idea on what to write. Come Wednesday, with 3 exams to be taken that day, I still wrote nothing. And I promised that I will start writing after my exams that day. And because I enjoy (yeah right) really procrastinating, I still didn't start right away. It was only the night before the wedding when I really sat down and typed away. With suggestions from friends, I was able to produce a wedding speech that is really from the heart. I've asked permission from Pau if it's okay for me to post the speech on my blog, and she gave me a go signal.


Good afternoon everyone.

For those who don’t know me, I am Bea, Kuya Marc’s second cousin, but right now, I’m closer to Pau.

I first heard about Pau a year ago, when Kuya Marc was here for a vacation from work in the US Army. And while we were having dinner with some of our cousins, my sister, Tita Malou, and a friend of Tita, Kuya Marc whipped out his cellphone and was busy texting. After that, he leaned towards my sister and said something like “There’s this girl who wanted to join us for dinner. But when I told her Mom’s with us, she suddenly changed her mind.” Little did I know, I was so close on meeting my future cousin-in-law.

And after a few weeks, I learned from my Mom that Kuya Marc’s getting married. “To whom?” I asked my Mom. “Paula raw yung name.” Then it dawned on me that maybe that’s the girl who was supposed to join us at the dinner. And from the beginning, this Paula girl wanted my sister and me to be part of their wedding entourage. And yes, we’re both here. And to cut the long story short, we became Facebook friends first before meeting in person. Sounds familiar? Just like Kuya Marc and Pau’s love story, diba? But in their case, it started with a picture nga lang.

Kuya Marc, Pau, just like your theme na “Love is Brewing”, I believe it’s not really about both of you loving coffee or that’s where you both got to know each other. It is, despite your cultural differences because of where you grew up, God has prepared the both of you for each other. Regardless of who’s speaking in English or in Filipino, you both meet halfway to be able to understand each other because you love each other. I remember one of their stories that Pau told me, after one of their “dates”, after Pau said goodbye and goodnight to Kuya, she just went into the FX that was waiting. She then noticed the driver was gently laughing and he told Pau, “Ma’am, magggoodnight kiss sa inyo si Sir, hindi niyo man lang binigyan ng pagkakataon.” Or another one was they were talking and in one instance, Pau told Kuya Marc that she misses him already, and Kuya deduced it as “I love you” already.

Kuya Marc, take care of Pau. And remember, whether Pau is right or wrong, always say “Yes, Dear” ha. Continue to put the glow in Pau’s face. Thank you for taking time to meet us whenever you’re here in the country. Thank you for your stories that leave us laughing our heads off. You’ll always be our Jay R the singer look alike, and Claire’s Speedy Gonzales.

Pau, finally, dumating na ang araw na ito. And all the hard work paid off! Rest na after this day. You’re the sister that I don’t have. Thank you for listening to my rants thru text, for replying to my out-of-nowhere texts. I appreciate our bonding moments that made us walk for hours while looking for the perfect paper for the invitations or perfect cloth for the envelope, and left us dead-tired in the end. Kapag nagshopping ka pala, wag mo papabuhat lahat ng bags kay Kuya Marc a, baka masama ka sa category ng ayaw natin na mga tao! Remember the couple we saw in the mall? The guy was carrying all the shopping bags of his partner.

Congratulations on your married life. Have a very wonderful future together. Continue loving each other effortlessly. There may be ups and downs, but in the end, you both know that you still love each other. Cheers to both of you! I love you both!

Sunday, July 22, 2012

Nail Art 2

After my post few months ago on Nail Art, I have done few more, with inspiration from Youtube videos that I find enjoyable to do, and suggestions from friends.

First off, I tried doing "Easy Rainbow Stripes", which I found on Youtube.

On my first try, I half-failed/half-succeeded on doing it. The base colors were dark so it didn't stand out... So, I decided to make another one.

Tadaaaa! Isn't it better now? :D

Next, I tried doing Rainbow Design, which I also found on Youtube.

My friend wanted me to do the ombre nail polish she saw on the net (click me!). So since the time she told me that, my nail was still short, so I waited and waited and waited until it grew so I can make this ombre. It was challenging. But the result was amazing! This is one of the nail arts that I did with both hands.

I tried doing the sponging technique, but not really doing an ombre polish as I used only 2 colors. I did this for the wedding of my cousin yesterday.

Thursday, June 07, 2012

I'm Special

I retyped this message from a paper I saw nailed on my cork board from the old house. I know it's given to us by a teacher of ours back in high school, I'm just not sure what year was that, but I'm suspecting it's 2nd year. Hehe. I don't know who the author of this piece is. But since it's undeniably a good piece, I decided to retype and share it. Happy reading!


I'm special. In all the world there's nobody like me.

Since the beginning of time, there has never been another person like me. Nobody has my smile. Nobody has my eyes, my nose, my hair, my hands, my voice. I'm special. No one can be found who has my handwriting.

Nobody anywhere has my tastes- for food, for music or art. No one sees things just as I do.

In all of time there's been no one who laughs like me, no one who cries like me. And what makes me laugh and cry will never provoke identical laughter and tears from anybody else, ever.

No one reacts to any situation just as I would react. I'm special.

I'm the only one in all of creation who has my set of abilities. Oh, there will always be somebody who is better at one of the things I'm good at, but no one in the universe can reach the quality of my combination of talents, ideas, abilities, and feelings. Like a roomful of musical instruments, some may excel alone, but none can match the symphony sound when all are played together. I'm a symphony. Through all of eternity no one will ever look, talk, walk, think or do like me. I'm special. I'm rare.

And, in all rarity, there is great value.

Because of my great rare value, I need not attempt to imitate others. I will accept- yes, celebrate- my differences.

I'm special. And I'm beginning to realize it's no accident that I'm special. I'm beginning to see that God made me special for a very special purpose. He must have a job for me that no one else can do as well as I. Out of all the billions of applicants, only one is qualified. Only one has the right combination of what it takes.

That one is me. Because... I'm special.

Thursday, May 31, 2012

Let Go.

Letting go of something, or someone, isn't as easy as it sounds. It's like picking up pieces of broken vase using bare hands; you don't pick them all up at once because: 1) you can't pick them all at once, and 2) you will hurt yourself by doing so, but instead, we pick them piece by piece.

When we let go of material things, we do it because we no longer need them or it ceased performing its purpose. If it doesn't have a sentimental value to you, you won't think twice giving it up, right?

Aside from material things, personal relationships are also candidate for letting go. May it be friendship, boyfriend-girlfriend relationship, marriage, and death. We let go of a friendship because one party decided to stop making the friendship continue or grow stronger. You let go of a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship and marriage because things are not working out. One of them might have fallen out of love, or priorities might have changed. Worse case is that there's someone else that would immediately take over your place in your other half's life. As for death, it's inevitable; nothing's permanent in this life, as life itself is temporary. Our loved ones may have gone, we may not want them to go but we have to.

We let go of these things because we want to lift the burden that makes our hearts twitch because of the pain it feels whenever we think of what supposedly we are holding on to. Memories, yes. These memories will forever stay in our minds, whether we want them or not, and we select those we want to always remember and overcome the memories we want to be erased. But these memories will not happen again. When we look back on those happy thoughts (or maybe depressing/sad for others), we tend to think, "What if things worked out differently?" or "Maybe I should have done this instead of that in order to save our relationship". Would they even still matter right now? Perhaps yes, if you are in reconciling terms/ civil with the other person. Otherwise maybe not.

Letting go is freeing yourself from the pain you acquire from the abrupt change in your friendship. Letting go is giving more time to your own needs than reminiscing the past. Letting go is giving up holding on to the memories and start making new brighter ones. Letting go is making yourself look forward to new challenges in life instead of pondering if somebody from the past would be disappointed for your actions. Letting go is making new acquaintances and friends rather than waiting for old friends to resurface in front of you. Letting go is giving yourself a total makeover in your outlook on life. Letting go is accepting the passing of your loved ones. Letting go is loving yourself more than you love others.

Monday, April 02, 2012

New Found Treasures

I admit that I used to not like buying books on second-hand bookstores. I just like going there, and enjoy the smell of the books. But a few years ago, I came to love second hand bookstores. It's a heaven of books from not so popular authors! Not only that, you can find books that cannot be seen from the regular bookstores, from the authors that you love. But I have yet to see a Nicholas Sparks or Cecelia Ahern or Sophie Kinsella on those bookstores, hehe.

Anyway, it's fun to discover "new" authors there, and prices are way cheaper than the original ones; there was one store where I recently went to and all the novels are priced on 50 pesos! And the good thing there is that the books are still in good condition. The authors I've found worth reading are Luanne Rice, Susan Wiggs, Kristin Hannah, Karen Crane, and Paula Reeds (all are fiction/romance writers). If you want a Nora Roberts or Danielle Steel or James Patterson novels, they also have their books there.

The down side of these second-hand bookstores? Books are not organized according to author or genre. Few years back, I asked if they have a certain title of one of the authors that I was addicted to at that time, they were somehow clueless; so I asked if they have a complete list of books they currently have on hand-- none. Sadness. So, I have to diligently browse all the books they have there to find what I was looking for.

And there's this different feeling when you get to see novels from the authors you've been watching out. Plus the smell of books. Plus the idea that you know you will have another enjoyed moment reading novels. All in all, it's pure bliss. ♥

Friday, March 30, 2012

Losing Friends

The art of losing isn't hard to master;
so many things seem filled with the intent
to be lost that their loss is no disaster,

Lose something every day. Accept the fluster
of lost door keys, the hour badly spent.
The art of losing isn't hard to master.

Then practice losing farther, losing faster:
places, and names, and where it was you meant
to travel. None of these will bring disaster.

I lost my mother's watch. And look! my last, or
next-to-last, of three beloved houses went.
The art of losing isn't hard to master.

I lost two cities, lovely ones. And, vaster,
some realms I owned, two rivers, a continent.
I miss them, but it wasn't a disaster.

-- Even losing you (the joking voice, a gesture
I love) I shan't have lied. It's evident
the art of losing's not too hard to master
though it may look like (Write it!) a disaster.

-One Art by Elizabeth Bishop

Have you ever come to a point in your life where a close friend of yours started drifting away from you and eventually it would seem like you don't know each other at all? Para bang wala kayong pinagsamahan.

I am the kind of person that does not consider a friend to be someone close to me, until he/she exceeded my expectations. And when I say close, I mean REALLY close. Like someone who would confide in me real personal stuff, and stuff like that. And when I gain close friends, I would really treasure them as they would take a major role in my life.

But when a close friend would say "friends forever", I sometimes wanted to doubt and ask, "Seryoso yan ha? Walang bawian yan kahit ano pa ang mangyari? Kahit after pa ng trials sa friendship natin e friends pa rin tayo tulad ngayon?" But sadly, that ain't the case.

Recently, 2 close friends of mine drifted away from me. One said we'll be friends forever yet this person just stopped talking to me, and the other one for some other petty reason. For the first friend, it's just weird that at one point we're constantly talking, and suddenly *poof*, I'm being ignored. It came to the point that I was really wondering if I should ask my friend already what's wrong. But I didn't; I don't know if it's the pride that hinders me or whatever else. Weeks, months passed by and still nothing from that person. So, if I like someone to share my frustrations or stories or whatever else with, I know I can't turn to this person anymore, no matter how much I want to. I wonder if that person still wants to talk to me like before.

As for my other friend, he "had to" drift away as his partner was getting jealous. So it's kinda like I was "accused" of "trying to steal the guy from her" or something like that. The girl is also my friend although I know the guy longer, and we talk in front of the girl naman but some physical gestures were misunderstood by her. At first I wanted to talk her out that there's nothing for her to be jealous of, walang malisya between me and the guy. But I thought that maybe she wouldn't want to hear any of it, so decided not to do it anymore. Hey, do I even look like a boyfriend snatcher?!?! Was I a threat to their relationship from the start? Do I even look like a threat?! So, yeah, we stopped talking after that, and I guess they're okay again in their relationship.

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Nail Art

To those who've known me from the start, they know that I am not kikay. At all. Therefore, I am not into those bracelets, or necklaces, or earrings, or even nail polishes. But yes, I do put nail polish once in a while, but only of very light shades. I remember the very first one I painted on my nails were metallic light green, and you can barely see it unless you stare at my nails. And this was back in college already. And over the years, I have my nails painted, maybe at least every 3 months or less, but I get frustrated as they chip off after I have them done. So I stop having my nails painted. Until recently, when nail arts are getting more famous, I enjoy viewing them. Yet I never have nail arts as they were expensive in nail salons. I compliment my sister when she get nail arts (she's the kikay one), or my friend does one.

So after looking at all those fantastic nail arts (and kept bugging a friend to do this and that), I told myself that maybe I could try doing one. But I thought that it's a tedious job. My friend did one nail art on me when she slept over at our place.

Here's the one that was done on my nails. Sabog nga lang yan cause it was done at almost 1am already.

The first ever nail art that I personally did was a bamboo. It was a promise for a friend that I will show her a sample of a bamboo nail art. 

And since I also promised her a panda...
But my panda is not looking so much like a panda. :))

Since I totally enjoying how people do the water marble nail art. I did one as well!
Water marble is the only nail art the I did in all fingers of one hand. Because I find nail art making tedious (but very fun), I usually only do one on my thumb.

And just early this afternoon, I did my latest nail art, "color block nail art", with the help of this video from Youtube.

I found few other nail arts that I found interesting to do, I'll do them some other time. :)

Sunday, March 04, 2012

I Won't Give Up

When I look into your eyes
It's like watching the night sky
Or a beautiful sunrise
There's so much they hold
And just like them old stars
I see that you've come so far
To be right where you are
How old is your soul?

I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up

And when you're needing your space
To do some navigating
I'll be here patiently waiting
To see what you find

'Cause even the stars they burn
Some even fall to the earth
We've got a lot to learn
God knows we're worth it
No, I won't give up

I don't wanna be someone who walks away so easily
I'm here to stay and make the difference that I can make
Our differences they do a lot to teach us how to use
The tools and gifts we got yeah, we got a lot at stake
And in the end, you're still my friend at least we did intend
For us to work we didn't break, we didn't burn
We had to learn how to bend without the world caving in
I had to learn what I've got, and what I'm not
And who I am

I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up
Still looking up.

I won't give up on us (no I'm not giving up)
God knows I'm tough enough (I am tough, I am loved)
We've got a lot to learn (we're alive, we are loved)
God knows we're worth it (and we're worth it)

I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up

Sunday, February 12, 2012

Mamma Mia!

Yesterday, I went to watch Mamma Mia with my mom at the CCP. The show was fantastic! If only I could watch it again and again.

Years ago, I was also able to watch the movie version of this musical, and both of the versions did not disappoint me. Both are entertaining and would really make you dance your heart out. I still don't know what came first, if it's the movie or the Broadway version, but according to what I read, they both are adapted from a book.

What I love about the movie version is that it captures the beauty of the island. On the other hand, what I love about the theater version is it has scenes that were not in the movie, as well as some ABBA songs too. And to make the stage realistic, they made the backdrop look like the sea. Both the actors from the movie and the theater did a very amazing job on portraying their roles.

The show will run for a week more, I think, and it's a wrap. The CCP is still jampacked with a lot of watchers, both children and adult. You can hear people singing to the tunes, and if the song is very familiar to them (such as Mamma Mia and Dancing Queen), the audience will acknowledge it by clapping real loud or shouting. By the end of the show, those seated on the VIP area, stood up and danced. Us in the balcony area, did not stand, as we might fall forward. Hahaha. 

Tuesday, January 03, 2012

2012 Horoscope Cancer

Not really a big believer of horoscopes but once in a while, I enjoy reading them. I got this one from At the end of the year, I will get back to this entry and check if this is true for me.

Major changes in your relationships are in store for the year 2012. Some of your near ones are likely to dfit apart leaving you in shatters. But avoid depending on others and rise and shine. Peace and calm shall prevail then in your life. Towards the middle of the year you may need to take an important decision in life related to personal and professional life of yours. If single you might meet the ideal partner. But beware of foxes in sheep’s clothing. New ideas of all sorts take shape this year. Keep your cool, and enter into actions to meet your plans. Success in legal processes are predicted for this year.

Much effort and commitment would be needed this year for good results in your professional front. Unavoidable difficulties shall come from nowhere leaving you in tenterhooks. Confidence in yourself shall help you to ward off any negative effects in the career side. You would pursue your long fought ambitions with renewed vigor and strength. Reveal your inherent talents to the workforce. The first half of the year would be very much exhausting while the latter half shall see you off sailing smoothly.

Finances shall take a good shape for you this year. Maintain your financial balance in a sensible way. An increase of income flow is assured but make sure you do not put all your eggs in one basket. Instead, diversify your portfolio. You can go in for some artistic pursuits for augmenting your finances for this year. It would give you the much needed mental and financial satisfaction in life. The second half of the year shall see a fall in your debt levels which would be a great moral booster for you.

Much peace and tranquillity shall prevail in your love front for the year of 2012. Stability in relationships is also guaranteed. Your ideals in relationships shall be met during this period. Be free to open up your heart to your loved one, be frank and try to understand the feelings of your partner. This is the apt time to clear any clouds of doubts in your relationship. Generally an average year as far as love and relationships are concerned for Cancers.

You are assured great energy levels for the year ahead. There would be a stability in your moods which had been deviating last year quite a bit. This would give you mental and physical health on a positive note. Take a resolution to cut down in bad habits that had been haunting you for the last few years. Concentrate on your works and take good care of your health.

Sunday, January 01, 2012

Christina Perri- Jar of Hearts

And who do you think you are?
Runnin' 'round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart