Maybe

Maybe... we were supposed to meet the wrong people before meeting the right one so that, when we finally meet the right person, we will know how to be grateful for that gift.

Maybe... it is true that we don't know what we have until we lose it, but it is also true that we don't know what we have been missing until it arrives.

Maybe... the brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past; after all, you can't go on successfully in life until you let go of your past mistakes, failures and heartaches.

Maybe... you should hope for enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials to make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human, and enough hope to make you happy.

Maybe... the happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way.

Maybe... the best kind of friend is the kind you can sit on a porch and swing with, never say a word, and then walk away feeling like it was the best conversation you've ever had.

Maybe... happiness waits for all those who cry, all those who hurt, all those who have searched, and all those who have tried, for only they can appreciate the importance of all the people who have touched their lives.

Maybe... you should do something nice for someone every single day, even if it is simply to leave them alone.

Maybe... there are moments in life when you miss someone -- a parent, a spouse, a friend, a child -- so much that you just want to pick them from your dreams and hug them for real, so that once they are around you appreciate them more.

Maybe... giving someone all your love is never an assurance that they will love you back. Don't expect love in return; just wait for it to grow in their heart; but, if it doesn't, be content that it grew in yours.

Maybe... you should dream what you want to dream; go where you want to go, be what you want to be, because you have only one life and one chance to do all the things you dream of, and want to do.

Sara Bareilles- Gonna Get Over You

All I Want for Christmas is/are....

1. KitchenAid Mixer. I'll be forever grateful to you if you buy me this one because this is very expensive. :D Oh, I'll also accept if this is color violet. Remember: Only orange and violet colored mixer will be accepted!

2. Wall Oven. Time to upgrade our oven? I guess so. Haha. But I need a new house to be able to fulfill this wall oven. Maybe when I get my own house. But you may also give me one now. :D

3. Car. My driver's license will expire on my birthday this coming new year, and I haven't held on the wheel for the whole year this year. No particular brand, color could be blue? Or silver? Or black?

4. iPad or iTouch. Something for me to kill time away from the desktop and when I get bored with books, cross stitches and origamis or paper stars.

5.  Boyfriend. Haha. I've been single for God knows how long when. Maybe once in a while I'm in the position where I need the comfort of being in love with someone you know holds your heart.

6. Books. I want to read more books!

7. Faithful Friends. Sometimes, I feel that some of my friends are not true enough to stay, that when they found new people, they just go *poof*. And when you're in need, even just for a company, no one is there for you. Not that I hate being alone, but sometimes, being alone makes me a lot sadder than it comforts me.

8. Handwritten Letters. I miss the excitement when you receive an envelope with a handwritten letter in it. Love letter will also do. Hahaha

Some are wishful thinking, some are real. You choose. Happy holidays, guys! Pardon me for not being able to post a lot lately. =)

Panuntunan ng Laro Para sa mga Lalaking Iibig sa mga Babaeng-babae

Saw this poem for Berso sa Metro this morning at the LRT on the way to school.

Panuntunan ng Laro Para sa mga Lalaking Iibig sa mga Babaeng-babae

by Gioconda Belli

Ang lalaking iibig sa aki'y

dapat marunong humaplos sa kurtina ng balat,

makita ang karaniwan kong mata,

at makikilala yaong namumugad sa akin,

ang transparenteng maya ng paglalambing.

Ang lalaking iibig sa aki'y

di ako iibigin bilang isang kalakal

o kaya'y ipagyayabang na parang tropeo,

mananatili sa aking piling

taglay ang pag-ibig kong

nadarama kapag siya'y kapiling.

Dear Lord

The following entry was found among my files, unfinished, written eons ago. I wrote this during one of the stages in my life, and somehow, I think it still applies to me today. Hihi. Edited few sentences to have a closing on this letter.

Dear Lord,

I am accepting the fact that he's not the one for me when I thought he was. That the one for me is not around yet, or maybe there is no "the one" for me at all.

I won't be receiving flowers from a guy, there'll be no sweet nothings or songs dedicated for me. I'll still dream for that first dance with a special someone. No one will ask me out on Valentine's Day, birthdays or just for a simple movie and lunch/dinner date.

I accept that I don't need another person to make me feel complete, that I am complete as I am. I accept that I don't need another person to make me feel loved as You alone makes me feel loved already. I don't have to feel miserable that the person I really like doesn't feel the same way as I do and he likes someone else.

In time, in God's right time, a guy will show up, knock me off my feet, give me flowers, write me letters and will love me for who I am, unconditionally. And when that time comes, I know I will be thinking that I must have been worth the wait and God decided to give me someone who will be there for me when I forget to run to Him or when I feel that God doesn't love me anymore. That this person will remind me that I am not alone, that someone loves me, like God does. =)


Love,
Me

Troubled Mind

This is a bit normal to me as having troubled mind for days is nothing new to me. But for some reason, I dislike having a troubled mind right now. I don't like what I'm thinking, I don't like the reasons for thingy such things, but I can't help it. I want to talk to someone about it, but I don't know who. I itch to text this person or that person or maybe this one, but I don't think they want to hear rants right now, especially that I think that one of them doesn't really care much about me. I want to write them down, but I also couldn't do so. Or if I be able to write them down, I cannot make myself publish it on the internet. 

Can I hide from this moment until I'm okay? Can I just lock myself in my room, not wanting anyone to enter? Can someone clear up my messy mind?

Day 30 – A photograph of youself today + three good things that have happened in the past 30 days

Day 30 – A photograph of youself today + three good things that have happened in the past 30 days

Wow, I can't believe this will already be my last post for the 30 day challenge. How come it's so fast?

Anyway, 3 good things that happened to me in the past month:

• I got to meet up with one of my closest friend, Michelle, whom I fondly call Mama. after months of not seeing each other. She's been my friend since Biology days and we went to med school and I left her there while I now take up another path. We still communicate constantly despite the busyness.
• We got a new dog! Well, technically, he's not our dog; he's my sister's cousin-in-law's dog and he gave Euro the Shih Tzu to my sister and her husband, but they can't keep the dog at their home so they brought him here. And every night, Euro sleeps in my room, on his own bed. Sosyal noh? Hahaha.
• I got to play volleyball again! I love volleyball, and back in high school, I was given a chance to join the varsity but declined the offer, so I'm kinda like a frustrated pro volleyball player. Haha. So I got to play during the intercolors of the college. We didn't win but we fought a good fight and it feels so good to be able to play volleyball again. And looking forward to play again next year.

And, forgive the quality since I only used a webcam and the website cameroid.com, here's a picture of me right now.

Day 29 – Something you could never get tired of doing.

Day 29 – Something you could never get tired of doing.

Something that I'll never get tired of doing... Hmm. It's a bit hard. But aside from the material stuff, such as reading, and all those stuff that I like, I guess I'll never stop collecting memories with those close to me. I value every happy moments with them, these moments kept playing over and over again if they are worth it. I'll never get tired of taking care of my family, despite all the dramas we have. They are there for me for the 24 years of my existence, and they've seen me through different phases. We may be not me very close like other families, but they are still my family. And lastly, I'll never get tired of moving towards my dreams.

Day 28 – Your favorite movie.

Day 28 – Your favorite movie.

These are my all time favorites movies. Never fails to make me smile and/or cry.

Music and Lyrics

Meet the Robinsons

Up

Letters to Juliet

50 First Dates

2 Weeks Notice

Cars

Day 27 – A picture of you last year and now and how have you changed since then?

Day 27 – A picture of you last year and now and how have you changed since then?

Nothing has changed within me since last year. I'm still the same. For picture reference, please check the Day 26 photo, just decipher what I look like there. :D

Day 26 – A photo of somewhere you’ve been to.

Day 26 – A photo of somewhere you’ve been to.

I went to Singapore last year during my semestral break. It was just a short visit there since we were only at my friend's friend's brother's apartment and she still has a pile of work to get back to. The picture's a bit dark since I did not use flash, and I kinda like it anyway. Lol. I am still waiting for the day that I'll be able to visit Singapore again (and stay there longer). But I wonder when will that be. 

Day 25 – What’s in your purse?

Day 25 – What’s in your purse?

What's in my wallet. Hmm.

• weekly allowance
• band aids
• driver's license
• TIN card
• blood donor card
• extra MRT and LRT stored value
• old DLSAU ID
• DLSU alumni ID
• National Book Store
• SM Advantage

There ya have it! :D

Day 24 – A photo of something that means a lot to you.

Day 24 – A photo of something that means a lot to you.

That photo would be my graduation picture on my first course. I won't post it anymore since I've already posted it for an entry recently. Anyway, I couldn't think of other pictures right now that would mean a lot to me aside from that one.

I think the reason why that means a lot to me is that, I was able to graduate few years back despite all the hardships I've been to (academically, socially and emotionally). I know a lot of people think that Biology is an easy-breezy course. Maybe because the Biology subject they had in high school were way simpler than what I studied in college. I value that graduation picture because it is a proof that I did not give up when I wanted to, I did not let some things completely eat me up when it almost did. With enough reason and determination to move on, I know I will get to the end.

And now, 2 more years and I shall have another graduation picture of mine taken. This time, it will be another proof of hard work and the determination to attain my dream. And here is where I cross my fingers hoping not to jinx everything.

Day 23 – 15 facts about you.

Day 23 – 15 facts about you.

I think I've been putting facts about me all over my blog, but okay, since you ask for 15 facts about me, here ya go.

• I like reading books, but I never read any suspense/thriller/mystery/ghost novels. The same with movies.
• I do not know how to swim.
• I do not know how to use chopsticks.
• I collect the keychains that are given to me; I hesitate to use them.
• I value family togetherness.
• I am a believer of karma.
• Make me do the laundry and other household chores, but NEVER the dishes.
• I am sensitive, moody and gets jealous easily.
• I've never been given any birthday surprise (and the likes) in my entire existence, that's why I want to experience one.
• I've never received flowers from guys. The only people who gave me flowers were my sisters, mom and aunt.
• I super do not like spiders.
• I know how to drive, but dad does not allow me to.
• I may have lots of friends, but only a handful are those I really trust.
• I enjoy writing poems, but it's been more than a year since I last wrote my last poem.
• I do not like singing in front of other people, even my friends; but I give in when they really, really force me to. Lol.

Day 22 – A letter to someone who has hurt you recently. A letter to someone who broke my heart.

Day 22 – A letter to someone who has hurt you recently. A letter to someone who broke my heart.

No one has hurt me recently. So there's nothing I can write about that. But for the someone who broke my heart, I have written an entry about that, some time last December 2010. From that point up to today, there's nothing more I can write about him. To read about it, do click here.

Day 21 – A photo of something that makes you happy.

Day 21 – A photo of something that makes you happy.

This picture of my bookshelf makes me happy because  I can't believe I have read that much books already since I was about 8 years old.

There's something about the full moon that I always like and it gives me a clearer mind whenever I look at the moon.

Day 20 – The meaning behind your blog name.

Day 20 – The meaning behind your blog name.

I have discussed about this already since I have decided to change my blog name few months back.

Quoting my post last February 20, 2011...

...I may be okay outside, smiling and laughing and stuff, but there are thousand things running in my mind, clashing one another. Thoughts that I want to write down, but whenever I am ready to write or type away, they suddenly are gone. Screw those thoughts that walk out on me. And because of that, I change my blog name from “Memories Worth Sharing” to “Me and My Babbling Mind”. As I was pondering on this, I figured that “Memories Worth Sharing” isn’t applicable to my journals anymore as I mostly rant or talk about basically anything. Go through my previous posts and you’ll see that it’s more or less confirmed that it’s a better name for my blog, right? Haha.

 Diba?

Day 19 – Another picture of yourself.

Day 19 – Another picture of yourself.

This is my college grad pic, taken some time 2007 for my graduation in 2008.
Hopefully, 2 more school years and I will have another graduation picture, now from my second course.

Day 18 – Something you crave a lot.

Day 18 – Something you crave a lot.

I'll forever crave for pizza. Nothing beats a hot pizza, with matching mozzarella cheese string when you pick up a slice. ♥

Day 17 – A photo of you and your family.

Day 17 – A photo of you and your family.

This is our family picture taken late last year.

Day 16 – Your celebrity crush.

Day 16 – Your celebrity crush.

I have no celebrity crush. Really. But I find these two actors hot. :))

Oliver James

John Cusack

Day 15 – Something you don’t leave the house without.

Day 15 – Something you don’t leave the house without.

First of all, pardon me for not being able to post yesterday as I got home late and my sister and her husband dropped by to leave us their dog.

So anyway, when I was younger, I don't care if I go out without bringing anything, especially when I'm with my parents. But as I grow older, I got to go out with classmates and that's when I started bringing my own bag with whatever stuff inside that sometimes I think I bring too many things that I won't be even needing for a stroll around the mall.

Things I will never leave when going out:

1. UMBRELLA- With the unpredictable weather the metro is experiencing lately, umbrella is a must!
2. MONEY- When I was younger, whenever I need to buy something, I'll have Mom or Dad beside me so that they'll pay for what I'll be buying. But now, I bring my saved allowance, or sometimes my parents give me extra money.
3. HOUSE KEY- It's a must as well because if I forget bringing the house key, I'll be a dead meat, especially if I come home late.
4. TISSUE- Sometimes, there are times that you do not want to wipe your hands on your hanky, and this will be the time that tissues will be handy, may it be the facial tissue or the wet type of tissue.
5. PHONES- So that I'll have a way to contact my friends if we are to meet up.
6. MRT AND LRT CARDS- I can't commute without them, ya know!
7. COMB- Need I say more?
8. WATCH- It's my only accessory and I need time check.
9. PEN- Who knows, you might suddenly write a dedication on a gift or something.

Day 14 – A TV show you’re currently addicted to.

Day 14 – A TV show you’re currently addicted to.

I love Glee. As much as possible, I would want to catch all the episodes every Wednesday night. But since the last season has ended few months ago, and the new season will come out next week, I'm just watching the replays of the second season, as well as the replays of The Glee Project which also recently wrapped up. I can't wait for the 3rd season of Glee to start, and how will the winners of The Glee Project do when they get to join the cast of Glee.

Day 13 – Your favorite musician and why?

Day 13 – Your favorite musician and why?

As I think about this, I think I can say that I really don't have a particular favorite musician. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that whatever I listen to that I get to like is based of what my mood for that moment, and it varies as long as they are sort of of the same theme.

As short as that.

Day 12 – A photograph of the town you live in.

Day 12 – A photograph of the town you live in.

Since majority of the people I know do not know where Pateros is located, I decided to post stuff about the municipality where I've been living for my whole life.

This is taken from HERE.

Southeast of Manila is Pateros, the smallest of the seventeen cities and municipalities comprising the Metropolitan Manila. Pateros before 1700 was only a barrio of Pasig called "Aguho" or "embarcadero". Aguho was derived from the name of numerous shady trees planted along the Pateros River, while "embarcadero" means a small port. As a port, Pateros was the focal point of trade and commerce not only for the entire Municipality of Pasig but also for the neighboring towns. It also served as harbor for the Malay, Chinese, Swedish and Indian vessels that periodically called to disembark merchandise and to engage in commerce. These were the reasons why Pateros as the most progressive barrio of Pasig was given the name Aguho or embarcadero.

The Chinese traders who eventually settled in the town introduced the most famous balut industry and alfombra-slipper making. The name PATEROS came from the Tagalog words "pato" — the duck that lays the eggs for balut making, and "sapatero" — the word for shoemakers.

As of 2007, the total population of all the barangays is 61,940. 

According to Wikipedia...

The Municipality of Pateros (Filipino: Bayan ng Pateros) is a First-class Municipality in Metro Manila, Philippines. This small town is famous for its duck-raising industry and especially for producing balut, a Filipino delicacy that is boiled duck egg. Pateros is bordered by Pasig City to the north, Makati City to the west, and Taguig City to the south.

Pateros is the only municipality and the smallest, both in population and in land area, in Metro Manila, but it is the second most densely populated at around 27 thousand people per square kilometer after Manila.

See how small the municipality I live in? =)

Day 11 – What’s in your makeup bag?

Day 11 – What’s in your makeup bag?

What's in my makeup bag? I've got the simplest answer for this question: I HAVE NO MAKEUP BAG! Lol. I don't put makeup unless it's a formal occasion that I must attend. My friends wanted me to have one before, they even bought me a blush on just so I can start putting basic makeup on myself. But I came to realization that whenever I put on some blush on, I'd remove it within minutes because I have the habit of wiping my face, especially if it's hot. The closest thing that I consider as part of my makeup stuff that I commonly use is a lip gloss, which I even seldom use; I only use it when my lips get dry. So in case I decide to have a makeup bag, I think I'll have these things inside: blush on, lip gloss and eyeliner.

Day 10 – A photo of your favorite place to eat.

Day 10 – A photo of your favorite place to eat.

I'll change the challenge to "a photo of a place where you want to eat" because there's a lot of places that I like so it's hard to choose which one is to be my favorite.

Since July, I've been wanting to eat at Yakimix. But since my family wouldn't be complete on the day that I would want us to eat there, I just scrapped the idea. My sister kept making me jealous because she's been eating there once in a while for the past 3 months. I miss their siomai hahha.

Sorry for the very short entry. Hihihi.

Day 9 – A photo of the item you last purchased.

Day 9 – A photo of the item you last purchased.

The last thing I bought for myself is a magazine that I've been collecting for 3 years now, Yummy Magazine. Yes, it's a food magazine, with recipes and all that stuff.

The very first issue of the magazine that I bought was way back May 2008, just before I started med school. I believe I was looking for school supplies in the bookstore when I spotted the magazine. I bought it, just to see what's inside since that was the first time I saw it. And after seeing all those promising recipes (which I believe I haven't tried any recipes from that issue until now--- must try some during sembreak!), I got hooked and that made me buy every month. =)

Day 8 – A song to match your mood.

Day 8 – A song to match your mood.

Welcome to My Life

Do you ever feel like breaking down?

Do you ever feel out of place?

Like somehow you just don't belong

And no one understands you

Do you ever wanna runaway?

Do you lock yourself in your room?

With the radio on turned up so loud

That no one hears you screaming

No you don't know what it's like

When nothing feels all right

You don't know what it's like

To be like me

To be hurt

To feel lost

To be left out in the dark

To be kicked when you're down

To feel like you've been pushed around

To be on the edge of breaking down

And no one's there to save you

No you don't know what it's like

Welcome to my life

Do you wanna be somebody else?

Are you sick of feeling so left out?

Are you desperate to find something more?

Before your life is over

Are you stuck inside a world you hate?

Are you sick of everyone around?

With their big fake smiles and stupid lies

While deep inside you're bleeding

No you don't know what it's like

When nothing feels all right

You don't know what it's like

To be like me

To be hurt

To feel lost

To be left out in the dark

To be kicked when you're down

To feel like you've been pushed around

To be on the edge of breaking down

And no one's there to save you

No you don't know what it's like

Welcome to my life

No one ever lied straight to your face

No one ever stabbed you in the back

You might think I'm happy but I'm not gonna be okay

Everybody always gave you what you wanted

Never had to work it was always there

You don't know what it's like, what it's like

To be hurt

To feel lost

To be left out in the dark

To be kicked when you're down

To feel like you've been pushed around

To be on the edge of breaking down

And no one's there to save you

No you don't know what it's like (what it's like)

To be hurt

To feel lost

To be left out in the dark

To be kicked when you're down

To feel like you've been pushed around

To be on the edge of breaking down

And no one's there to save you

No you don't know what it's like

Welcome to my life

Welcome to my life

Welcome to my life

Day 7 – Your dream wedding.

Day 7 – Your dream wedding.

My dream wedding. Wow. This is a bit tough for me to write since I don't really think about me getting married. But of course, there's this hope of getting married. So, anyway, here it goes.

Like the usual weddings, I want to ceremony to occur in a church with close friends and relatives (as much as possible, not a very big crowd. If a lot of relatives would be invited, maybe limit the number of invitees per family? Hahaha.) as witnesses. White flowers, not necessarily roses, will line both sides of the aisle, with hints of other colored flowers. Everybody will dress and look their best.

As for the reception, I want it to be somewhere near the church to be less hassle for every guests. I want the reception to take place during the time of sunset (I just love sunset, so cheesy of me, wahaha!). I like the reception to be in a simple yet elegant looking place, perhaps with lots of sweet-smelling flowers to fill the place. Of course, I want the guests to enjoy, feel the love in the air and have fun for the rest of the night, old friends reuniting and talking, meeting new acquaintances among the crowd.

Day 5 – A photo of yourself two years ago.

Day 5 – A photo of yourself two years ago.

This was me 2 years ago, just few hours before the wedding of my cousin. I seldom wear makeup and have a picture of myself taken (I'm camera shy. Hahaha.) so this is one of those moments that I let myself be captured.

This is another photo of me 2 years ago, this was taken at the hotel we stayed in at Hong Kong. I believe this was semi-candid by Claire.

Day 4 – 10 ways to win your heart.

Day 4 – 10 ways to win your heart.

1.     Be real.

2.     Accept me for who I am.

3.     Cook for me. :D

4.     Sing for me!

5.     Write me letters. Handwritten.

6.     Be a gentleman.

7.     Fight for me.

8.     Make me smile for whatever reasons.

9.     Fulfill one of my small dreams.

10.  Surprise me!

Day 3 – Your idea of the perfect first date.

Day 3 – Your idea of the perfect first date.

For me, anything goes on a date. I would rather have a date that has no itinerary of some sort. But as much as possible I hate—no, I think it’s too common—to watch a movie on the first date. But yeah, I experienced that before. ANYWAY, that is beside the point.

For the first date, I’ve always dreamed of spending the day with the person somewhere that is not too crowded, tamang dami lang ng tao. As I’ve said, going to malls is common already so cancel that as a choice. I think I won’t be choosy where my date would bring me, as long as I will enjoy his company; that’s what’s important right? And the place shouldn’t be difficult to go to by commuting, so I won’t have a hard time going there, hehehe. We may spend the whole day together, or just half of the day, either’s fine with me, he shouldn’t bore me to death; I want us to have an endless conversation, anything and everything under the sun, no dull moments. I want us not to be aware of the time, enjoying every moment. I want one of the highlights of our date would be watching the sun set. Cheesy? Yeah, I am cheesy.  I don’t know if people still do that nowadays, but I want to experience watching the sunset with someone special.

So I won't elaborate more on what I want on a perfect first date, nawawala essence of surprise. Hihihi.

Day 2 – A photo of something you ate today.

Since I am having problems uploading pictures from my phone to our desktop, I think something's wrong with our bluetooth device, I just borrowed a photo from this blog.

So this is something that I ate today. Mushroom and Spinach Pizza from Sbarro. I've been craving for Sbarro for about a month now and I just kept putting it off, sometimes I just don't have the appetite to eat while at times I super wanted to eat, I couldn't because of school stuff. I was lucky to have this pizza today since I wanted something with mushroom. I usually would ask for additional mozzarella cheese, but this time I didn't (I still have 3 bars of mozzarella cheese here at home!!)

A dash of hot sauce here and there on my pizza, and it's perfect. I rarely eat spinach (they don't cook that here, and now I wonder why) so having it on my pizza and a glass of lemonade makes Bea a happier eater. =D

Day 1 – A photo of yourself and a description of how your day was.

Soooo... I have decided to do a 30 day blog challenge. Actually, I originally wanted to do this on my Tumblr account, but since I don't open it as often as I do on Blogspot and LiveJournal, I thought of just doing the challenge on Blogspot and LJ. Will I be able to finish this in a month?

Day 1 – A photo of yourself and a description of how your day was.

So this is a picture of myself at this moment. I just used the camera of the laptop so please bear with the quality. Hahah.

How was my day? Let's say, my day can be divided into 2 different feelings. The first one was that I was panicky/scared due to the 3 exams we had today. I was supposed to wake up early this morning to study some more. But, I didn't hear my phones' alarms, therefore I woke up at 3am. Since I will be waking up an hour after that, I decided to just go back to sleep and not study anymore. The exams were somehow okay. Not great, just okay. I was just thankful that I didn't review too much because if I did, I will just scream in frustration. You get what I mean now? Basta yun.

The 2nd feeling I had for the day was excitement. Mondays usually mean we go home VERY late. Yet today, we got to leave school at quarter to 5!!! There's still sun when we left school. We were just happy to go home early. And, to top it all, tomorrow, we have no classes, making our early dismissal even better.

Day 2 tomorrow!

Tambayan

For someone who’s a homebody, I have a lot of favorite tambayan, about one on each place that I’ve always been going to.

Back in Biology days, my ultimate favorite tambayan is the gazebo behind our college building, St. Joseph Building, and the William Hall. I’ve always like going there, may it be early in the morning when no one has arrived, or nearly lunch time before people will crowd the small area to study or sleep or eat their lunch bought from Agno. I remember always choosing a table facing the back, where I can just stare at the plants, and sometimes take pictures of them, just away from people coming to the gazebo. I remember one of my close friends would text me after her class, “Asan ka?” and I would reply, “Sa lungga ko.” At first she would wonder where my lungga is. But eventually she’d realize that my lungga is the gazebo. The gazebo is the place where I have written a lot of muni-muni articles (some posted at my LiveJournal account), as well as some poems; it’s also the place where I find peace in myself despite all the dramas I was going through during *that period* of my life; it’s one of the places where I shed tears (I don’t remember why I cried, but I remember who made me cry, hahaha). How I wish I hang out on gazebo from the start of my college years instead of the only last 2 years. If I get to visit Taft again one of these days, I will definitely take some time to seat again at gazebo and reminisce. =)

Another favorite tambayan of mine back in Bio days would be the second floor of the Sports Complex, overlooking the swimming pool. I remember there was a time that we (my friends and I) were hanging out there, watching the swimming varsity do their practice because Enchong Dee was there. Well, I don’t remember now if we saw Enchong or not, I wasn’t interested anyway, haha. Anyway, we would just sit there on the floor, or sometimes lie down, during our long breaks. On my last year there, it was one of the places I frequently go to, so we can finish typing our thesis paper. I remember my thesis partner and I almost had a petty argument there, all because of the pie chart we were making. Haha.

I know Starbucks is now a rather common place for everyone, to hang out or to study or to do whatever, that a lot of branches get jam-packed, making it difficult for you to look for a vacant seat. My first time to stay at Starbucks to study, I didn’t quite like it, maybe because of the time I went, around lunch time, thus the place was buzzing loudly with chattering people here and there. Eventually, I made a habit of going there early (before 7am) so that it’s still quiet and I can choose a place to study. My first Starbucks tambayan was at Torre Lorenzo near La Salle Taft. Staying there wasn’t what I really wanted to do, but I guess I wanted to try studying there for a change when I thought that staying inside the campus was a bit suffocating due to some incidents in my life. When I went to medschool, my friend and I tried studying at the Starbucks located at the hospital. The area was small and always full so I wasn’t satisfied. We then tried the branch at SM Fairview; far it maybe, but what I liked there was that it’s spacious and despite being inside the mall, it’s quiet. Now in vetmed, I swore that I will stop going to coffee shops and just study here at home. But. But. But. I failed doing that. Well, actually, I succeeded last year. Just this year, more likely just recently, when I met up with my cousins, we stayed at this branch at Bonifacio High Street. It’s a bit far from my usual “spot” in Market!Market!, but the walk from Market to Boni High is all worth it when you arrive there without so many people and my favorite spot is free! So yeah, I’ve been going there once in a while, more often now on exam week to study. I still feel comfortable there, not very much jam-packed and the staff is very, very friendly.

In a year from now, will I have a new tambayan or I still have the same one? Hmmm…

Dear Diary

I'm currently reading Ang Mga Kaibigan ni Mama Susan by Bob Ong as my non-academic book. It's style of writing is like journal entries. The main character of the story kept writing on his journal even if it's no longer required, as he started writing one because of a subject that requires the class to submit a journal. He just wanted to continue writing to be able to express his feelings, as if talking to other people, when he has no one to talk to. So far, the book is a good read, just skipping the scary parts. You know why if you really know me. Hahaha.

Diary, journal, online journal, blog. So many names but all pertains to one thing. I rarely call the blog/ diary a journal because I spent 4 years of college associating journal to Chemistry laboratory. Seriously. I remember that I had my first diary when I was in Grade 2. I think I forced Mommy to give me one. And I still have it! Hahahah! But what do I know about diaries at that age? All I know was that I wanted to write down the daily activities of my life, and funny I wrote my entries in numbered list. After that first diary, I believe that's when I started to give a name to my succeeding diaries; I named her Jamie. I don't know why, I think I like that name way back. Also, I started writing in paragraphs. I think I have at least 5 diaries all in all. I don't remember where I put them, they must be somewhere here in my room. Must look for them!

I was in high school when I learned about online journals. My first blog was livejournal, but I couldn't remember my username months later, so I made another one, but this time here in blogger. I updated my blog often until such time that I got very busy that I stopped updating it and ended up deactivating my account. When I regretted deactivating it, I made another one with LJ again. And now, here's my blogger again and I simultaneously update this and LJ.

Sometimes, I wonder how it feels if I am still writing in diaries. Maybe I would've said more as it'll be more private than having your thoughts blogged online. As for my online blogs, I do not mind if no one's reading them, but sometimes I am a lot curious who reads my blogs; who appreciates my thoughts, who don't mind what I wanted to rant about or something. I remember, few years ago, I was talking to a cousin-in-law and she was telling me that it's good to write in a diary but in order to keep its privacy until you die, you better burn it. I wonder how many people still write in diaries nowadays...

Talking to Strangers

Don’t talk to strangers. That’s what we were told when we were younger. But as for me, shy that I am, I really don’t talk to anyone that I do not know. My friends can attest to that.

So anyway, this afternoon, when I went it the train, I sat just near the door so that I won’t have a hard time alighting the train when we arrive at Guadalupe Station. Luckily, the area that I chose has aircon so it’s just perfect as it was oh-so hot outside. When I was settled on my seat, a lady sat beside me and commented that she’s happy about the aircon. I acknowledged her and she started talking about the heat and how it gives headache and I was just nodding and smiling since I don’t know what else to say (see, I’m not that conversationalist with strangers). Then she asked me something, and I thought she was asking about that time so I answered her, “5 o’clock po” while pointing at my watch. And she said, “Ah hindi, tanong ko kung nurse ka,” to which I answered, “Ah, hindi po, veterinary medicine po.” She started asking me about veterinary stuff, such as how we handle/restrain dogs, how about when dogs are pregnant (she was surprised that dogs can undergo caesarean section—did I say this correctly?), have I handled snakes and monkeys, and so on.  She then asked where I go home. When I told her where, she remarked that she lives also on the same municipality, but on the opposite end. And our topic became Ondoy, how she saw some places near their house to be very flooded and stuff. When we reached Guadalupe Station, I walked ahead of her.

And now I was thinking, should I have said goodbye to her? Because I didn’t, I walked ahead of her, way ahead of her actually. Although I have not said much, I had fun talking with her. And I guess it’s not that bad to talk to strangers, but of course, you just have to watch out what you are to say.

100 truths

Because I'm sort of not yet in the mood to study as of the moment, I just decided to answer this, which I got from a friend who tagged me on FB.

1. Real name: Bridget Co

2. Nickname(s): Bea, Bei, Bey, Bridge, Jet, Bebong

3. Zodiac Sign: Cancer

4. Male or female: Female.

5. Elementary: pasig community school

6. Middle School: -

7. High School: makati hope christian school

8. College: de la salle university- manila, de la salle araneta university

9. Hair color: black

10. Tall or Short: tall

11. Sweats or Jeans: Jeans.

12. Phone or Camera: both

13. Health Freak: no

14. Orange or Apple: orange

15. Do you have a crush on someone: ohyeah!

16. Eat or Drink: eat!

17. Piercings: None

18. Pepsi or Coke: Coke

19. Been in an airplane: yes

20. Been in a relationship: Yes.

21. Been in a car accident: no

22. Been in a fist fight: no

23. First piercing: when i was still young, earrings.

24. Best friend: they know who they are =)

25. First award: best in something... back in nursery pa. hahahaha

26. First crush: i don't remember anymore. hahaha

27. First word: i don't remember

29. Last person you talked to in person: dad

30. Last person you texted: Genina

31. Last person you watched a movie with: high school classmates

32. Last food you ate: mango

33. Last movie you watched: bridesmaid

34. Last song you listened to: dancing queen

35. Last thing you bought: clay

36. Last person you hugged: hmm... someone among my friends. i just don't remember who.

37. Food: pasta, pizza.

38. Drink: Water. juices

39. Bottoms: pants

40. Flowers: roses, lantana, rosal

41. Animal: dogs, cats, rabbit, hamster, guinea pig

42. Color: orange and violet

43. Movies: romcom. haahaha

44. Subjects: parasitology hihihihihi

HAVE YOU EVER: (Put an X in the brackets if yes)

45. [x] fallen in love with someone.

46. [] celebrated Halloween.

47. [x] had your heart broken.

48. [x] went over the texts on your cell phone.

49. [] had someone like me

51. [] got pregnant.

52. [] had an abortion.

53. [x] did something I regret.

54. [x] broke a promise.

55. [x] hid a secret.

56. [x] pretended to be happy.

57. [x] met someone who changed your life.

58. [x] pretended to be sick.

59. [x] left the country.

60. [x] tried something you normally wouldn't try and liked it.

61. [x] cried over the silliest thing.

62. [] ran a mile

63. [] went to the beach with your best friend.

64. [x] got into an argument with your friends.

65. [x] hated someone

66. [x] stayed single for 2 years. (more than 2 years)

CURRENTLY:

67. Eating : nothing

68. Drinking: water

69. Listening: glee project

70. Sitting/Laying: computer chair

71. Plans for today: study. hahaha

72. Waiting: waiting... for something?

73. Want kids: yeah, eventually.

74. Want to get married: yeah, eventually.

75. Career: still studying, but i want to be a successful veterinarian soon.

76. Lips or eyes: eyes.

77. Shorter or taller: Same.

78. Romantic or spontaneous: Both.

81. Hook-up or relationship: Relationship.

82. Looks or personality: definitely personality! bonus na ang looks.

HAVE YOU EVER:

83. Lost eyes/contacts: nope

84. Snuck out of a house: nope

85. Held a gun/knife for self defense: nope

86. Killed somebody: no!

87. Broken someones heart: nope

88. Been in love: yes.

89. Cried when someone died: yes. 

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

90. Yourself: most of the time yes

91. Miracles: yeah

92. Love at first sight: before. i don't now.

94. Santa Claus: i used to!

95. Aliens: no

96. Ghosts: yes!!!!!!!

97. Is there one person you want to be with right now: yeah

98. Do you know who your real friends are: i guess so

99. Do you believe in God: YES!

100. Post as 100 truths: okaaaaaaay

Girls' Night Out

It’s been almost 7 years since I graduated from high school. And it’s been about 3 years since I last saw most of them. Why? Because ever since I stopped med school, I stopped showing at get-togethers.

Anyway, they decided to meet up last Saturday afternoon, only informing me the Friday before that. Since I wanted to relax a bit after the prelim exams, I confirmed my attendance to them. I arrived way early than that of the meeting time so I just roamed around. A few minutes after 430pm, one by one arrived; Michelle, Abby, Ms. Gulapa and Gretchel. We went to watch Bridesmaids (good movie if you’re gonna watch it with your girl friends, not with your family. It’s a feel good movie, R18 nga lang but they made it R-13 here in the country). After the movie, we went to meet Sarah, who was accompanied by her sister, at the food court and went to hunt for a good restaurant to eat. Since it was late already and it’s a Saturday, most restaurants that we decided were already full. T.G.I.Friday’s full as well but we’re lined up as second to be seated. While eating, Charmaine arrived. After dinner, they wanted to have dessert, so off to find Café Breton; however, Sarah had to leave earlier as she’s not comfortable with driving at night, I think.

I had fun that night even if I arrived home almost midnight. Thanks to Charm by the way for giving me a ride home! Maybe it’s my pride that prevented me from going to the get-togethers when I stopped med school. I guess they were somehow waiting for me to be a successful physician of our class, but I failed them. As to prevent a lot of questions as to why I stopped and stuff, I just stopped showing up. But now, I promise that as long as my schedule allows me to go out, I will join them.

So, this is me with Sarah (in the middle) and Eugelyn, Sarah's younger sister. Sarah and I go way back kindergarten years, we went to the same school all the way to college.

I am with Gretchel in this picture. Gretchel's one of my close friends in high school.

Of Falling in Love and Breaking Up

If you’re my friend that I’ve made chika about this, or you’re reading my blog(s) for quite some time now, or even a gossipmonger, then you’ve probably heard this a million times from me. But then again, I will be talking about it once more, making me sound like a broken record. And I promise, after this piece, I will not talk about this anymore.

When I decided to take up Veterinary Medicine, I made myself concentrate on studying and forget about falling in love with anyone. I succeeded. Had a crush on someone but got a bit “brokenhearted” when I learned that he’s already taken. But since it’s just a crush, it didn’t really affect me. And eventually, I have a friend which I never thought I’d fall for. Let’s just say that at first he wasn’t the type of guy that I will fall for. I was and still comfortable around him whenever we talk. He’s always making me laugh at the right moment that I need a good laugh, and I think somehow we complement each other and we’re open to each other. There may be some things that we don’t agree on, but we meet halfway. I like him. I really, really, really like him that sometimes whenever I’m walking along the streets, I would suddenly think a guy would look like him. Funny/weird but true. I really thought it would be him but of course it’s absurd because he doesn’t live anywhere near where I live. And I know that I’m just a friend for him. Although someone told me that there might be more from his side, I somehow doubt it. As I’ve always said, I do not want to expect anything at all but I’m open to possibilities. Come what may. If God wants us to be together, then time will come for that. If not, then we’re just better off as friends.

About few months ago, a friend was hinting that she cooled off with her boyfriend. I thought it was just a joke at first since I still see pictures of the two of them together on their respective Facebook accounts. I tried asking her numerous times for the real score but she either changes our topic or just kept mum. And I respect her for that. I just thought that if she’s ready to share, she will just text me. True enough, about a month ago, she confided that they both agreed that they will not text each other for a week since the guy wants time to think. She told me that she’s itching to text him every minute and I kept telling her not to text him since they had an agreement. Instead, I told her that she should just divert her messages to me and pretend that I’m the guy so that she can still send the messages just to get it out of her system.

About a day before their one week agreement is up, my friend texted me that she is officially single. The guy texted her, thanking her for everything and it’s better for them to be friends. And as I’ve always told my friends that just came from a breakup, I told her to cry it out that it may make her feel better even for a moment. She told me that she’s still okay and has somehow accepted that it really is over. To make the long story short, she denied the situation, she bargained again and again for another chance with him (which he insisted that no more, they should just remain as friends), and denied it more.

Few days before my friend’s class started, we met up with an ex of hers, who is now her good friend. With her is a notebook where she wrote letters for her guy, from the day they agreed not to communicate up to the day before we met. And on the first day of their classes, she informed me that the guy wasn’t carrying anything with him to school except for the notebook where she wrote letters and they were together the whole day, as if they were still a couple. Right now, it seems that the guy has found a new girl. But my friend said that it hurts her but she will still do communicate with the guy as she believes that it’s the way for her to move on. Just over the weekend, my friend wanted to study at Starbucks and of all people she would invite to join her studying, she contacted him. And he instantly agreed to join her.

Ang sa akin lang, no offense to my friend or to anyone as this is my own opinion, if you really love someone, why let her go pero you would still act like a couple after breaking up? Edi sana you didn’t breakup with her na lang in the first place. If you want to move on and heal your broken heart, it’s best to stop having communication with him of any sort. It hurts to see the person not hurting anymore and with another girl while you still are crying and maybe cursing the person for breaking up with you, but if you still communicate with him then you are adding more injury on your side. Siguro nga every individual has his or her own way of moving on, but if you said you will move on, panindigan mo; huwag mong babawiin ang sinabi mo. Don’t let a break up or a heartache affect your studies or work or your life itself. Let’s just remind ourselves that a break up teaches us a lesson that will help us grow more mature in terms of love and become a stronger person. If the two of you are really meant to be together in the end, there will be a way for you to end up together again, don’t force it. However, if you’re not meant to be, just let it stay that way. Have a proper closure.